


even if the skies get rough

by wafflesofdoom



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst, Drama, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 06:06:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8566816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wafflesofdoom/pseuds/wafflesofdoom
Summary: "dont give up on us aaron, please.""you might want to start giving me a few reasons not to."in the aftermath of robert and rebecca's kiss, aaron and robert have a conversation about where their relationship is - or isn't - heading. [post the november 15th episode]





	

“ _It’s not about us._ ” 

Robert raised an eyebrow at Aaron’s mocking tone, closing the door behind him. His fiancé was sitting on the stairs, as if he’d been waiting for Robert to get in. His eyes were red-rimmed, and he’d clearly been crying. He was hunched in on himself, worrying his teeth against his bottom lip.

Robert’s heart was in his mouth as he replied, Aaron’s words ringing in his ears. 

Surely he couldn’t know already, could he? Robert had begged Diane to stay quiet, that it hadn’t been what she thought it was - that he would explain it all to Aaron, that there was nothing to worry about.

That he would never cheat on Aaron, not after everything they’d been through. 

“What?”

“Don’t play stupid Robert, it doesn’t suit ya.” Aaron said, clearly upset. He was twisting his engagement ring around his finger, his jumper tugged down over his hands, always a clear sign that he was upset. “Diane wasn’t the only one who listened in on your conversation with Rebecca.” 

Robert snapped into defence mode, shaking his head. “Aaron, it’s not what you think.” He said, his voice steady, reassuring. 

“I told you to stay away from her.” Aaron said, pausing before correcting himself. “I _asked_ you to stay away from her, for _us_. And then you invite her in to _our_ home for a cosy drink? What, you really needed to think back to the good old days when you were sleeping together? That **had** to happen today? Why couldn’t you just listen to what I wanted for once, eh? I asked you to stay away from her.”

“Aaron… I’m not cheating on you, I swear.” Robert said. “She kissed me, yeah - but I pushed her away.”

“You didn’t exactly shout from the rooftops that you were pushing her away because of me though, did ya? Its about _Home Farm_ , is it? Good to know where I am on your priority list.”

“You know what you mean to me, Aaron.” Robert said, standing in front of his fiancé. “I love you.”

“Yeah, you keep saying. You’re enough, Aaron, I won’t want anyone else, Aaron.” Aaron’s voice was bitter as he spoke, throwing Robert’s words back at him. “Funny, its hard to believe all that when you’re getting cosy with your ex-girlfriend on _my_ couch. Did it cross your mind that we were getting cosy there last night? Did ya think about me at all?”

“You are everything to me Aaron. You’ve got to believe that - I’ve proved that to ya, over and over again.” Robert said. “I don’t want her. I want you. Only you.”

“Then why did you tell her _now_ wasn’t the time? Because Robert, to me that sounds like there is a time coming when you’re going to want her enough to give in, and I’m not - I’m not going to sit here and wait for you to come home, and wonder where you’ve been and who you’ve been with. You’re not going to turn me into that person. I deserve better than that.”

Aaron ran a frustrated hand across his face, wiping at his watery eyes. “You’re forgetting I know exactly what you say and do when you’re cheating on someone, Robert. I was her once.”

“Aaron, there’s nothing going on.” Robert said desperately.

“I don’t believe you.” Aaron’s eyes welled up with tears, a few stray ones escaping down his cheeks. He sniffed, blinking furiously. He didn’t want to start crying, he didn’t want this to hurt as much as it did. “I’ve been through hell and back with you, and you want to throw this away for what, a quickie on our couch? You’re an idiot if you think she’ll want anything more than a bit of revenge on Chrissie, so she can lord it over her that you picked her over Chrissie, over **me.** She’s as bad as the rest of them, Robert, everything is a game that she’s got to win.”

“Aaron, please, you’ve got to believe me.” Robert begged. “I’m not - I’m not doing this, any of this to get myself into bed with her. I don’t want her. I don’t want anything to do with her, or that family. I’m doing it for Andy, and as soon as I clear his name, I’ll walk away. I swear - but I’ve got to clear his name first. I’m doing all of this for Andy.”

“See, you say that, but I don’t believe you anymore.” Aaron said, pausing to take a shaky breath, counting to ten in his head, trying his best to stay calm. “If this was about Andy, you’d be taking the fight right to their door, as always. But you’re drinking whiskey and thinking about all the fun times you and her had in hotel rooms behind her sisters back, and none of that sounds like a plan to clear Andy’s name.”

Robert shook his head. “It wasn’t like that. She’s a mate, Aaron -“

“A mate I told you I wasn’t comfortable with you having.” Aaron interrupted. “Do I come into this at all, eh? Did you mention me to her one or were you both happy to ignore the ring on your finger? Because I know you’re _well_ capable of doing that.”

“She knows what you mean to me, Aaron.” Robert said, trying to be reassuring. He didn’t want anyone else, that’s what he should have said to Rebecca. But the words hadn’t come out of his mouth when he’d pushed her away. 

_Now’s not the time._

_How much of an idiot was he?_

“But she doesn’t, does she? Because she still thinks she’s got a chance with you, and don’t give me the ‘oh, I didn’t make her think that’ bullshit, because you were holding her hand in David’s this morning, and you let her sit in our living room and talk about all the _great_ sex you used to have, and all of that Robert? That’s giving her the impression that you’re still up for it, fiancé or not. She could care less about me, and right now, I’m getting the impression I don’t really come into this for you either.”

Robert stayed silent.

“The fact you’re not even arguing with me makes this worse, Robert.” Aaron shook his head, tears pouring down his cheeks. “I want you to go.”

“Aaron, please, don’t - we can talk about this.” Robert reached out, Aaron backing away from his outstretched hand. Robert could feel his own cheeks getting damp, his vision blurring as tears welled up in his eyes.

“I’m not saying it’s over. I’m saying I need space, and I need time.” Aaron said. “I need you to go so I can think. I’ll drop some of your clothes over to Vic’s, alright? I just need you to _go._ ”

Robert took a shaky breath, stepping back from Aaron. “If thats what you want.”

Aaron laughed humourlessly. “Do I look like I _want_ you to go? Robert, I didn’t say yes to marrying ya because it seemed like a fun way to pass a couple of years. I said yes because I’m in this for the long run, and I thought you were too. This isn’t what I want. I want you to keep your promises and not go behind my back with anyone else. But I _clearly_ can’t make you do what I want, so I need space to think.”

“About us?"

“About whether or not we should keep at this at all.” Aaron said, his fingers twisting his engagement ring again, a new nervous habit of his. Right now, all it did was draw Robert’s attention to the ring he’d put on that finger barely a month previously, making his heart beat out of his chest as he realised the enormity of what Aaron was saying. “Because it always feels like the universe is sending me reasons why we can’t work, and you’re not helping right now.”

“I love you, Aaron.” Robert said, almost begging. 

“You’ve got a funny way of showing it. Get out, Robert. _Please_.”

Robert didn’t move.

“Robert, get out, before I say summat I _really_ regret.” Aaron said, raising his voice for the first time. He was angry, and upset, and all he wanted was Robert, despite his stupidity.

But he couldn’t, he couldn’t let him stay, not knowing what he’d said to Rebecca. 

Robert nodded, and he turned toward the door, pausing with a hand on the door handle. “Don’t give up on us, Aaron, please.”

“You might want to start giving me a few reasons not to.” Aaron said bitterly, shaking his head. 

Robert yanked open the door, stepping out into the cool November air. He leaned against the closed backdoor of the Woolpack, letting himself cry, tears pouring down his face. 

How could he be so _stupid_? 

Frustrated, Robert lashed out, punching the stone wall of the pub, letting out a pained cry as his fist collided with the wall, his knuckles bleeding and scratched up immediately. 

Inside, Aaron leaned his head against the stairs, letting his tears fall, hysterical sobs ripping through his body as he sat, angry, and upset - and oh so _alone_. 

**Author's Note:**

> tonight was fairly shitty writing tbh (but its soap-land friends, when is anything written well for more than a few weeks?) so i very much felt like i had to write this fic and get it out of my system. 
> 
> i genuinely want aaron to go ballistic at robert over this, but who knows, so rather than wait i wrote this. and now i'm going to go be annoyed at my trashcan son robert on tumblr (jayerin) if you fancy yelling with me!


End file.
